Mar 4 2014

33 Weeks Pregnant & Lemonade Gets me All Excited

Posted on March 4, 2014 by admin

As I’ll be 38 weeks as March disappears into April, I think by then I’ll have served my time. So this weekend Mini Madam had her eviction notice well and truly served.

Week 33 was an interesting one. MM has shifted on upwards and is now (crucially) off my sciatic nerve. This has meant, for the first time since January, I am now able to zip up my own boots. I also had a bit of wind a few days ago (I can now safely put this down to the entire 2 litre bottle of lemonade I consumed whilst catching up on One Born Every Minute) which saw me frantically googling labour pains and repacking my hospital bag with excitement bordering on hysteria. Needless to say, a few burps later and the panic was over.

33 weeks bump 33 Weeks Pregnant & Lemonade Gets me All Excited

It’s getting difficult to do basic things and I had to call Craig to help me shave my legs a few days ago. I figured it was this or potentially go into labour looking like a PG Tips chimp. Given most of the midwives at my local hospital went to school with me and could blackmail me on Facebook, I couldn’t face the shame.

Speaking of Facebook - I’m dropping from people’s timelines like no ones business. I’m learning the hard way that first babies are big news, second babies are timeline-clutter. I toyed with the idea of running a mini competition to guess Mini Madam’s weight, but I’m guessing I’d get an embarrassingly small number of comments that would send my pregnancy hormones into overdrive.

The deliveries were thick and fast last week and the guy from UPS began to look more and more haggard with each new parcel he lugged up the hill to my front door. Our bednest is now in place and ready for it’s new tenant, and we’re drowning in clothes and blankets that haven’t found their way to drawers yet. The whole operation resembles a stockroom at Babies R Us. Everything is still wrapped in cellophane and looking too new and perfect. Nothing like our actual home which looks like Dexter has invited around 30 of his playmates for a messy play soiree. I’m just too exhausted and ‘wide’ to do any housework.

This week (34) is the biggie. We’re off to see the consultant on Thursday (imagine a less jovial Anne Hegerty from The Chase, and you’re not far off!) who will scan me for the final time to determine Mini Madam’s position. If she’s still breech, there’s little that can be done. I suspect my consultant will still try to push the ‘cheaper’ VBAC option and advise me to spend the next few evenings ‘dipping my hips’ and contorting like a member of Spelbound. But Craig and I will pull the plug at this point and insist on a date for an elective Cesarian. I’m too anxious about this birth to leave it to chance.

Right now my guess is that she’ll defy all odds and be head-down by Thursday. This will send me into an entirely new panic and force me to discover a whole new world of Ugly - perineal massages, tweaking nipples and birthing balls… Oh the joy.

Feb 19 2014

31 Weeks Pregnant

Posted on February 19, 2014 by admin

… And I’ve had enough. In fact, I’m counting down the days until I can serve Mini Madam with an eviction notice without being seen to be willing on prematurity. The thought of another 9 weeks (2+ months!) of swollen hips, uncontrollable moodiness, and cries of “Ooompf” when I accidentally stomach crunch my little girl, seems like nothing short of punishment.

Dex 31 Weeks Pregnant

It’s taking sooo long, even Dexter needed reminding.

Now all my final appointments are booked, there’s nothing to do but wait. In a few short weeks, we’ll discover how this birth plan is going to play out and whether April will see #Labour tweets and unsightly pictures of me flailing around on a birthing ball from inside the Royal Berks Hospital.

My once pert little bump is now a sagging lump like an old sofa cushion riding low on my pelvis, and I’m now kicking myself that I didn’t undergo hypnotherapy to kick my cherry bakewell habit in the first trimester. This has bought on a relatively new phenomena for me - stretchmarks. In fact my belly now looks like the glaze on a loaf of tiger bread. No amount of smothering myself in Bio Oil seems to shift them and I’m slowly facing up to the fact that my bikini days are now definitely over.

SPD and sciatica continue to plague me at each at every waking moment. I’m getting by on around 4 hours sleep at night and as many naps as Dexter will allow. I’m definitely struggling to switch off as the pressure to get our 52 name shortlist down to 10 heats up. This insomnia is real problem and I’m positively hideous to be around. I’ve caught Craig camping out in the kitchen a few times and his eyes will widen in fear if I go within 3 metres of him.

When I’m not being as evil and cynical as Katie Hopkins, I’m usually crying at something ridiculous on the television. Coverage of the floods on the news, the sheer offensiveness of Mister Maker’s theme tune, or the GB curling team at the Sochi Winter Olympics… yes curling. What has my life come to?

31 weeks 31 Weeks Pregnant

Preparations for baby’s arrival are still woefully underfunded. With not one but two insurance claims put in this week (one a result of a nasty car accident) we’re berating ourselves for not having attacked the January sales with more ferocity. She now has a bath, and all the furniture she needs, and I’m delighted that she’ll be spending her first few month in an NCT bedside crib courtesy of Bednest, but she’s looking set to be a right exhibitionist as we haven’t bought her a single sleepsuit or babygrow. My breastfeeding ambitions better go to plan too as there are no bottles in the kitchen cupboard either > This is all a little woe-is-me isn’t it? We’re not as poor as I make out, but it certainly feels like it sometimes.

I was very close to reneging on the No Pink rule this week too. Having had my head turned by a seriously cute Laura Ashley print, I very nearly abandoned the grey and yellow nursery theme in favour of chintzy flowers. Thankfully Craig caught me just as the mouse cursor hovered over the checkout button and he gave me a stern talking to. I can now safely say I’m back on track and thinking rationally again.

So that’s it. This is the person I am at 31 weeks pregnant. Please tell me it gets quicker from here on in - Please, please, please.

Feb 2 2014

Introducing the Snoozle Maternity Slide Sheet!

Posted on February 2, 2014 by admin

As I’ve thudded into the third trimester, I’ve all but given up on a proper night’s sleep. I’m now on my third brand of maternity pillow (finally settling on the Theraline - review HERE) and am up around fives times a night to empty my bladder. We’ve also now upgraded our double bed to a super king - this wasn’t even up for discussion, I just went ahead and ordered it at 4am after a particularly bad night a few weeks back. Craig’s face was an absolute picture when he came home and discovered I’d taken a sledgehammer to the bedside cabinets and bought smaller ones in their place. I simply couldn’t cope with another elbow in my face and now need at least the width of a double bed to myself to toss and turn in my sleep.

When I spotted that Snoozle were looking for pregnant women to road test their maternity slide sheet, I thought I’d give it a go. The website is full of claims it’s helped women with painful night-time maneuvers. It’s said to help with a zillion different pregnancy ailments including SPD and Sciatica (two things I’ve regularly whinged about during both of my pregnancies), and also non-pregnancy related arthritic pain or easing the discomfort of those recovering from back surgery.

So what is it?

It’s a 75×75″ ‘tube’ made from kind-to-skin cotton on the outer layer, and a satin inner fabric that is designed to slide comfortably with your every move. It’s incredibly simple, but often these are the very products that work the best. It’s a concept that’s worked a treat for Icelandic midwives for years and has now been recreated by Snoozle for all to benefit from.

The theory is that it makes your movements smoother and faster so you don’t need to put in as much effort when you toss and turn. This means you won’t use as many sore muscles and move as many painful joints. It’s ideal if you’re bed-sharing as it only goes on your side of the bed and is designed to be completely noiseless so as not to disturb your other half. Reportedly, it also makes rolling out of bed in the mornings that little bit easier.

086 Introducing the Snoozle Maternity Slide Sheet!

It’s highly recommended during child birth when you’re struggling to change position (don’t worry, it’s washable at up to 60 °c), and equally useful if you’ve had a c-section and are struggling to sit up in bed to breastfeed.

So what did I think?

First up - I love the simple packaging. It came in a really pretty box which is handy to tuck away in your hospital bag if you’ve bought two.

I was sent a pink Snoozle (but it is also available in blue or grey) - the design is as simple as I’ve suggested above but I’m really impressed with the quality. The logo is embroidered so it doesn’t irritate you when in contact with your skin, and the outer layer (that you sleep on) is soft to touch.

snoozle bed Introducing the Snoozle Maternity Slide Sheet!

You simply pop the sheet on the bed (on top of your regular bed sheet) with the satin trims beneath your shoulder and thighs. It’s very generously proportioned so you have plenty of room either side.

There’s no denying my movements were MUCH faster and smoother with the Snoozle. I’m also making far less noise when I toss and turn. I used to moan and whimper a bit as it was so painful. It’s also completely noiseless and hasn’t disturbed Craigy in the slightest. Having used it for the past 5 nights, I’m happy to report I feel much more rested in the mornings and my symptoms are better throughout the day as a result. If I have a bad day and Mini Madam pushes down on my sciatic nerve one too many times, I simply have a nap on my Snoozle and gain a few hours respite.

My only niggle (not a criticism of the product at all as this is completely unavoidable) is that after several turns from side to side, the Snoozle inevitably gets twisted underneath you. This shouldn’t wake you up at night, but does mean you’ll constantly have to straighten it out when you get back from every one of your many trips to the loo!

060 Introducing the Snoozle Maternity Slide Sheet!

But that’s it! I can’t think of anything that would prevent me recommending the Snoozle maternity slide sheet to anyone who is struggling with sleep in pregnancy. It’s had a huge impact for many mums-to-be and is only a tiny £24.00. In fact, so convinced is Snoozle’s founder Lilja that it’ll help you, she offers a full money-back guarantee if it doesn’t!

DISCLAIMER: I was provided with a Snoozle for the purposes of his review. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

Linking to Tried & Tested by the lovely Kate at Family Fever and Colette at We’re going on an adventure.