So this week I went to see the midwife to discuss the extended breech saga. Beforehand I’d been really worried I’d be dismissed with a casual flip of the hand “Private scan companies don’t have the expertise to interpret your baby’s position”, “Don’t worry she’ll turn when she’s ready”, or “You had a bad experience with your son which has got you in panic” - Thankfully I have the best midwife in the world.

She was quick to have a little feel of her own but conceded that imaging is by far the most accurate method of determining baby’s position. Without further ado she pulled me up to my feet, placed her hand on my knee, looked into my eyes and asked me how I was feeling. I’d spent so many sleepless nights worrying about Mini Madam and how I was going to get her out safely, I hadn’t really thought about myself. I wasn’t expecting that question at all and it took me all of 30 seconds to reach for the Kleenex.

She pointed out to me that some women are just unfortunate. There are a whole host of reasons why your pregnancy history could have bearing on subsequent pregnancies so I might simply have an underlying predisposition for carrying babies in this way. Although this makes it less likely I’ll ever give birth naturally, at least history has shown us I can bring a beautiful, happy and healthy baby into the world. There’s no reason at all that this shouldn’t be the case for Mini Madam - she’ll just make her way into the world via scalpel rather than her mummy pushing her out.

In a bid to get to the bottom of the problem she’s brought forward my final consultant date to the beginning of March where we’ll find out once and for all Mini Madam’s position. This is the earliest recommended date possible as a consultant is unlikely to make any recommendation at all prior to 35 weeks. If she’s breech (in any way whatsoever, I can book my c-section there and then. Having had a previous c-section I’m not a candidate for ECV so no attempt will be made to turn her - big relief!

I wasn’t so much upset by the idea of not being able to birth naturally - I guess I just expected a fight with the NHS to get authorisation for a c-section. The thought of my waters breaking hadn’t seemed like an exciting prospect anymore - it seemed like a nightmare. I’d had all sorts of visions of pushing for hours on end then being rushed into surgery - I’d been consumed with worry about the distress it would cause my daughter.

I’m so pleased my midwife asked me what I wanted, rather than blithely following the handbook. She’s even booked me a same-day appointment with her immediately after the consultant, just to talk through my revised birth plan (if indeed it will change). She explained that this is because although my consultant will guide me through the physical procedure, she’s not best placed to talk to me about me.

Now I’ve had time to think about everything I feel much more relaxed. I’m not sure Mini Madam does though. She’s definitely up to no good in there and I can feel one side of my pelvic bone bulging in protest (SPD). The pain is mild yet persistent and keeps me up most of the night. I have discovered a genius product (Snoozle - a maternity slide sheet) which does help, but my mind is still struggling to shut down at night. I’ve refused physio for the SPD as I’m fairly good at pain management, I just feel we might be meeting our first daughter a little earlier than first anticipated.

So the answer to the question is… we just don’t know. But we are one step closer to finding out. All I do know is that I’m not the first mum-to-be that will undergo a second c-section, and I won’t be the last. These little monkeys do have us worrying don’t they?