I’m now 26 weeks pregnant, and I’m feeling brilliant. Finally.
I can overlook the constant need to pee and the not-so-elegant roll-and-fall out of bed in the mornings as the sickness and exhaustion finally seems to be over. Hopefully now I’ll have a months respite before Bump and I go crashing into the third trimester.
Once again, this week has flown by. This is probably down to the fact I had several antenatal appointments which, barring my 35 week consultant check, should have been my last. I had a routine midwife appointment, and a blood test for gestational diabetes - but unfortunately I somehow managed to mess both of these up. It seems I was some 3 weeks early for the midwife so she’s asked to see me once more, and I overlooked the copious notes advising me that I needed to fast for 2 hours before my blood test. Having walked into see the nurse at the blood clinic with a cereal bar and coffee in my grubby hands, she quickly waved me out of her room and told me to re-book. Despite feeling like a bit of prat, I’m actually secretly pleased that I’ve diddled the midwife and will get to hear Mini Madam’s heartbeat in stereo again.
The midwife did point out that Mini Madam is measuring 2 weeks ahead of schedule. This is nothing to worry about but I’m keeping fingers and toes crossed that this is just a ton of amniotic fluid and not a 10lber in there. This is (hopefully) the first baby I’ll be birthing naturally so I’m hoping she’s of weeny proportions so I can cough her out demurely and not disgrace myself on D-Day. Still, I’ve gone ahead and booked in a private 4D scan to make sure this baby isn’t unnaturally HUGE and isn’t, in fact, sporting a willy. Having had previous experience of these scans, I suspect baby will spend most of it showing me her bum or hiding behind the cord but hopefully she’ll give us a sneak peek of her face.
Speaking of unflattering pictures, here’s Bump and I at 26 weeks. I’m looking a little like Harry Enfield’s Waynetta or my old English teacher who went to great pains to tell us all that “It’s fluid retention, I’m not really this fat” when someone wrote something mean on the wall in the school toilets. I’m surprised I’m not being followed around shops in town by security, my bump is easily the size of a decent House of Fraser haul! There’s no denying I’m growing a little one in there anymore and no amount of sucking in restores my former hour-glass figure (Ha!). Nope, now it’s clear to everyone that I’m an unmarried mum-to-be - oh the shame!
But I can’t blame Mini Madam entirely for my super-sized bump. I am craving cherry bakewells and other Mr Kipling treats like a deranged and less-discerning Nigella Lawson. This is very unlike me as during my non-pregnant days you’re far more likely to spot me sneaking out of Greggs with a sausage roll stashed in my bag, than you are hiding behind a menu at Patisserie Valerie. But this diet can’t be all that bad as I mentioned last week I’ve lost weight throughout this pregnancy. I’ve actually lost a further 3lbs this week *mustn’t grumble*.
Right, that’s it - my 26 week update over. I’m off to raid the treat cupboard then sit and cry at adverts with small children in them. Until next week.
