As Dexter is soon to turn 4, I’ve been looking into how to make this year’s party extra special. Luckily, this will be the first he’ll remember as we’ve had some pretty disastrous trial runs before now. I hired a clown (costing some £200) for his 2nd birthday and 5 out of the 10 children cried uncontrollably. Those that didn’t spent the duration of the act whacking each other with balloon animals in my living room whilst the parents formed a human chain around the telly and other breakables. We also had a joint birthday with his little baby sister last year that resulted in food poisoning and one child breaking an arm on a bouncy castle.

Whilst Googling stress-free shindigs for tots, I stumbled across an interesting infographic from SunLife about how much Brits blow on our children’s birthday parties. Their recent research into household income and spending in the UK has revealed that as many as 8 out of 10 families with kids under 16 throw a birthday party, spending some £100 each year.

I can well believe it too. The cost of hiring out a venue, food and party bags quickly escalates beyond even the most generous budget.

Worst up are soft play packages where parents can find themselves paying £12-15 per child. Invites go out, parents don’t RSVP and others don’t show up. On offer is a few hours sweaty play with the rest of Joe Public, a few jugs of orange squash and a £2 per head buffet that has most probably been sourced from Iceland. The only advantage for mum and dad is that you can sit on your bum throughout the entire thing and let someone else worry when sausage roll guts are squished into the carpet.

So just how do you trim down the cost whilst creating a memorable day for your birthday girl or boy?

How old is your child?

As much as you tell yourself you’re throwing your 1 year old a lavish bash for them, 9 times out of 10 it’s a vanity project for mum & dad or simply an excuse to re-wet the baby’s head. Where intentions are more honourable, they’re also misplaced - the fact is your baby won’t have a single memory of the party when they’re older. You’ll end up some £300 down and the birthday boy or girl will probably spend 90% of the event either napping in their car seat or having a colic-induced panic attack whilst being manhandled by well-wishers.

It’s the same with toddlers. Before they go to nursery, they’ll have a limited social circle mostly consisting of your friends’ children and, if lucky, a smattering cousins. The ratio of adults to children will be much higher and ergo your budget is stretched to cater for bigger tummies. My only tip if you absolutely insist on marking the occasion, is to hold the party at home and spend the greatest portion of your budget on wine and beer. You’ll find the kids are quite happy running around the garden and not in the least bit bothered about any activities you’ve got planned.

Do-it-yourself

I’ve touched upon the scandalous price of soft play centres above. The trick to keeping costs down is to do as much as you can do yourself. Make up lunch boxes for the kids so no food goes to waste or put on a low-cost spread from a cash and carry. You can always sell off some of the birthday pressies on eBay after the party to recoup some of the cost (I’m joking! I’M JOKING).

Jade from Late for Reality also points out that joint parties with siblings and friends can cut down costs massively. In the case of siblings, it’s also less pressure on guests as they only have to set aside one date rather than two. If organising with another parent, just make sure you set similar expectations and declare both your budgets upfront. Don’t get stung when parent 2 hires Calvin Harris for 2 hours and expects you to foot half the bill.

Seasonal parties

If you’ve had enough forethought to conceive your baby around Halloween, they’ll have their birthdays during the summer holidays. Well done you as this means you can shave £s off your event. You can make use of your garden as a free venue and (hopefully) you won’t need to hire tents, canopies or other expensive equipment to keep your guests comfortable. Mary from My Model Mummy has also come up with the rather nifty idea of hiring hay bales from the local farmer as seating to save money - a bit of cheap bunting and you’re onto to something really quite charming. Same goes for Emma from the Mini Mes and Me who once organised a huge egg hunt for her daughter’s Easter birthday.

If a bouncy castle is too expensive, ask your guests to bring swimming gear and invest in a big paddling pool instead. These needn’t cost the earth and will get plenty of use throughout the summer. If the cost of this is still giving you palpitations, get on down to a DIY merchants and grab some waterproof sheeting. Add a little washing up liquid and a hose and you’ll have yourself a makeshift water slide like the one off I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here. You’ll have to supervise this one but I won’t judge you for having a few glasses of wine whilst doing so.

There you have it - tricks to keep costs down for kids birthday parties! Any more? Leave me a comment below!