Intuition In Pregnancy | My Mills Baby

Quite unbelievably I’m now 18 weeks pregnant. I just can’t believe I’m almost midway through. With Dexter, pregnancy definitely consumed me. Every conversation, dream or decision was unconsciously linked back to the baby in my tummy. This time around, I can honestly say there are entire days when I completely forget I’m pregnant. It’s the visual prompts that will snap me back to reality - the Pregnacare tablets by the kettle, or the What to Expect app on my iPhone, catching a glimpse of my disappearing waistline in the mirror etc.

Dexter is definitely a great distraction from mulling over every little twinge. His little personality is so infectious, and he seems to manage something new everyday - it’s easy to lose yourself in parenting him, and not looking ahead to when I’ll be responsible for two babies. We’re also in the middle of moving house so I’m living among boxes and chaos. As there’s so much to organise, it’s this that’s at the forefront of my mind at the moment. When we’re in our new home I can finally start nesting and preparing for this baby.

Capture1 18 Weeks Pregnant Eek! I Felt a Kick!!!

The new house!

Baby at 18 Weeks

I’ve heard it said that you’re likely to feel kicks sooner the second time around. With Dexter, I was able to say with certainty I’d felt a kick around week 22, with this pregnancy, I’ve been feeling somersaults and flips for a few weeks now, and on Saturday I felt the first thump of a tiny foot just below my belly button. This little foot cannot be much bigger than a Barbie doll’s, but I definitely felt it. Since then, I’ve been far greater attuned to any movement, and baby continues to wriggle around in there. It’s definitely a reassuring development as my anxiety continues to be a problem.

Baby is, hopefully, now the size of a sweet potato (approx 12cm) and growing at pace. The most important thing to note is that his or hers sex organs are now distinct and recognisable. Our gender scan is just a matter of days away now, and I’m very excited. I’ve wavered back and forth between thinking this baby is a boy or a girl, and it will be a genuine surprise when we find out. With Dexter, my intuition told me all along he was a boy so the scan merely confirmed it. Of course, we’ll be delighted either way so long as baby is healthy, but I must admit I am nervous at the prospect of having a little girl. I think this is simply because I’ve reassured myself that I’m a good mother to Dexter (and really enjoy it) so I’m a little scared of the unknown.

baby development 18 weeks pregnant 18 Weeks Pregnant Eek! I Felt a Kick!!!

Me at 18 Weeks

My own weight seems to have slowed down these past two weeks and there’s not too much to note in terms of my bump. Craig did point out that my belly is much harder than it was with Dexter so I’m trying not to think too deeply about what this could mean.

My hair and nails are growing faster and thicker which is not without its irony as I couldn’t feel any less attractive at the moment. Although the flu-like symptoms are beginning to taper off, I’m still exhausted and really value my naps in the day.

There are a few new symptoms to report. I’m smelling phantom smoke at night and am continually seeking it out in the early morning. I’m also up at 4.32am every morning without fail which I assume means this is a likely feed time for the new baby. Finally, I’m very short-tempered (I’m blaming this on the pregnancy rather than admit I’m like this most of the time). Craig’s coping well with it and managing to laugh it off but I can go from happy to moody in less than 60 seconds.

So What’s Next?

Shortly after the anomaly scan, we’ll meet the consultant for the first time. This appointment is also playing heavily on my mind. I’ve been forewarned by my midwife that the consultant will want to know my thoughts on a VBAC, and will, in all likelihood, suggest I should attempt it. I’m sure you’ll hear lots of musings from me over the next few weeks on this very subject.

So that’s enough from me… these updates are getting longer and longer! If you’re pregnant and would like to win an ultra sensitive doppler to listen to baby’s heartbeat, stick with me over the next few days as there’s a very exciting competition on its way…

So we’ve made it to 8 weeks!

This pregnancy continues to be really eventful. I’ve had two bugs now - both lovingly passed to me by Dex. We’ve endured gastroenteritis and now sinusitis. I’m feeling bunged up with an earache, a sore throat and a blocked nose. This whilst still averaging two bouts of morning sickness per day - usually around 9pm and 4am. I know people will have experienced worse pregnancies, but right now, I’m almost at my limit. I feel unhealthy and ill.

I don’t want to complain too much. We’ve been waiting for this pregnancy for months and I’m not suggesting it’s putting a dampener on the experience. I’m just so worried that my body is failing the baby in some way; that all the tiredness, nausea, and sickness is making my belly an inhospitable place to be. It’s all the worse as we’re still yet to meet the midwife - I stupidly said I was a few days (rather than weeks) pregnant when I booked the appointment so we’ll be meeting her for the first time on the 12th September (I’ll be 9.5 weeks).

The long wait to have any official checks and kick off the medical notes is scaring me. I’m still utterly convinced this is a multiple pregnancy and that’s making the anxiety worse. My belly is huge (which could be owing to several other factors such as lax muscle tone, gas, or a larger than average uterus) but for me, I just have this feeling that there is more than occupant in there. I don’t know how I’ll feel if I’m wrong.

It doesn’t help that I’ve gone into full-on research mode again - What to Expect When You’re Expecting is my bedside companion, and I’ve been abusing the hell out of 4OD watching One Born Every Minute all day. Right now, if this is a single pregnancy, this baby is the size of a raspberry and beginning to take shape. If you could peek inside, this is what would be happening:

You’d see an upper lip forming, the protruding tip of that cute button nose, and tiny (and very thin) eyelids… Your baby’s webbed fingers and toes are differentiating now (too) WhattoExpect.co.uk

It’s just incredible that in such a short amount of time, this bump could be playing host to such an amazing thing. But I just can’t picture it like I could with Dexter. All I can think about is twins. Although twin pregnancies are on the rise here in the UK (About 1 in every 65 pregnancies in the UK today is a twin pregnancy - NHS Direct) I don’t fit the normal profile of a mum with twins - I’m only 30, this was a natural conception, and I’ve only successfully carried one baby through to full-term previously. I don’t even have some of the common symptoms of a twin pregnancy - but I can’t seem to shake the feeling.

With all these concerns, I’ve deliberately changed doctors to get access to a different midwife for this pregnancy. My experience with Dexter was so traumatic, I just didn’t want to work with my previous midwife again. She failed to recognise Dex was extended breech (despite us showing her images from a 3D scan) and we had to wait until 35 weeks to have an ECV. This turned out to be unsuccessful and the trauma of the procedure ruptured my placenta. Given we also had the miscarriage at 12 weeks back in January, I’m now more determined than ever to work with a midwife who will help me through my anxiety.

I just hope and pray that my midwife will be able to rule out or confirm twins are a possibility using a doppler at our first appointment. If not, I’ll be insisting on an early ultrasound so we have some answers before we go on holiday on the 28th September.

So there you have it. That’s as much of an update as I can muster today. I’m so exhausted I’m off to have a lie down.