You either love them, or you hate them. Either way you’ll most likely have recorded X Factor this weekend and headed off to a fireworks display. We did. We whacked on an unprecedented amount of layers and begrudgingly headed off to one held at Reading Town Football Club.
All the usual insanity that comes with a one-off local event ensued. We were helpfully shown how to park by what seemed like the entire Reading barracks of the Territorial army - that’s 5 boys and girls in army fatigues stationed every 20 metres to wave us into a clearly defined car parking space we were perfectly capable of finding ourselves. Once in the football ground there was the usual 30 metre queue to the clubhouse where people were happy to queue for over an hour to get a pint in a plastic cup, and dozens of teenage girls in inappropriate clothing. Not for the first time, I made a mental note to host a mini family party at home next time.
This year the organiser’s managed some surprisingly passable entertainment. For £5 entry fee you’re not exactly expecting an Artic Monkey’s concert, but the organiser’s focused their attention on Reading’s talent, and a host of local acts performed on a rickety stage in a pokey corner of the football ground. We watched a young pop group (EverYoung) perform covers of Katie Perry’s Roar & Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines and were especially impressed. If these guys aren’t planning on applying to X Factor next year, I’ll be really surprised.
They also bravely invited X Factor’s local boy Fil Henley to the stage. This guy had me cringing a few weeks back when he made it through to perform in front of a live audience at Wembley. If you’re racking your brains trying to work out which reject I’m talking about. He was the ‘Rock God’ with Jim Morrison-inspired hair that still lives at home with his mum. Famed for flipping a chair in the audition room to prove his rock credentials, he went on to perform shirtless at Wembley, flicking his hair around like Slash whilst murdering That’s Metal (To My Ears).
I won’t be too cruel, he was actually great entertainment. I was in fits of giggles when the wind blew the microphone from its stand and he fumbled his guitar to retrieve it. Somehow, the instrumental continued in the background whilst he went handsfree to grope around on the stage for his mike - very funny. Despite this, he showed himself to have an infectious sense of humour and sounded great when the wind wasn’t howling in protest. I don’t think he was especially pleased though as his set was cut short by 80% as Reading’s answer to Flawless overran. Dexter seemed to enjoy it though and even tried to mount the stage to join him!
Speaking of Dexter, he had a great time doing laps of the poorly lit football pitch. His toddling is coming along really well but he does appear to have issues changing direction. Plucking him out of his pushchair for a quick stretch of his legs will see him running away without so much as a backward glance at mummy and daddy. We needn’t have bothered popping on all those additional layers as trailing in Dexter’s wake is a work-out in itself.
We didn’t bother with ear defenders as we knew he’d rip them from his head in seconds. He didn’t seem bothered at all by the bangs, in fact, he didn’t seem bothered about the fireworks either. I think he was just enjoying the novelty of being out past 7pm.
I definitely felt some flutterings when the display started - baby 2 was either very excited, or totally distressed by all the noise. Craig wrapped his arms my waist and placed his hands on my belly and this seemed to settle things back down. This was probably my highlight to be honest - it’s getting to the point where Craig will be able to feel some kicks and that should make the whole pregnancy feel far more real.
Leaving the show at the end of the display felt a little like Hillsborough. Far from being melodramatic, I’m very surprised no one got hurt. There was lots of elbowing trying to get out and I even clocked a few mums hauling their pushchairs over fences. Dexter was really distressed and I found myself popping a protective arm around my bump. If the organiser’s somehow wind up reading this - please ensure there’s a dedicated exit for pushchair users next time.
So that’s it. Another bonfire night over. God help us when there’s two children to contend with next year. I might beg off and let the boys go alone. It’s that, or get a few crappy fireworks from Tesco and hold a party in our back garden.
What did you all get up to?