Oct 16 2015

Shocks at Dexter’s first nursery parent’s evening

Posted on October 16, 2015 by admin

I love Dexter’s new nursery. It’s attached to the school I went to as a child, and I was overjoyed when he got offered a place. Not only is super convenient for me to get to (2 mins walk door to door), it’s also rated among the top nurseries in Reading. The staff are mature ladies with kids of their own, and the emphasis really is on preparing them for school. In fact, his ‘foundation’ unit is included in the same e bulletin as the school’s, so you feel like your child has started their school journey already.

First day…

Within a few days Dexter was getting himself dressed and waiting by the back door an hour before we had to leave. He’d run to the school smiling and there were no tears when it was time to say goodbye. His enthusiasm hasn’t waned and he likes it so much I’ll often pull him back into line when he plays up by saying “Do you want to go to nursery today? Well behave then”.

Yet his first parent’s evening came as a bit of a shock. Don’t get me wrong, it was as thorough and comprehensive as I expected from such an amazing school and I’m not disappointed by Dexter either - it just seems I see a radically child at home to the one they see at nursery everyday.

Shock #1 - He doesn’t wee there

He’s into his fourth week now and only once have I been passed a carrier full of sodden clothes. In fact, we’re so encouraged by Dexter’s progress, he doesn’t wear any nappies at all now - even on long car journeys. I credit the school for this as much as ourselves. I know he is regularly shown to the toilet and the nursery are incredibly supportive to children learning the ropes. However it seems my little lad hasn’t managed one wee in the school’s facilities.

His teacher has even allowed him to take in his favourite toys into the toilet cubicle and propped them up on the loo roll dispenser to keep him company. Yet Dex just rolls his eyes and walks away.

Often when I pick him up, we’ll walk to the shop to buy a packet of sweets for after dinner. This means, he’s often going 4+ hours without emptying his bladder! This is absolutely not the nursery’s fault but I think I’m going to have to get him to take a tinkle in different toilets when we’re out and about so he can get used to it.

First day…

Shock #2 - He’s pretty much mute

I know Dexter’s vocabulary is woefully limited. We’ve taken him to speech therapy and had more than one row with the GP over it. At home however he is a constant babbler. We often joke he’s fluent in Korean as he thinks he makes perfect sense and we’re the idiots for not understanding.

Yet Dexter hasn’t said so much as one word at nursery. In fact, his teacher has decided to alert the SENCO and put him on their radar. I’m actually really pleased about this as it’s all useful evidence should we decide to seek another referral later. However, the fact he’s completely silent is a little concerning.

Despite this, his teacher is actually really impressed with his non-verbal communication. She’s spent a lot of time with Dexter and is confident he understands her. He’s also able to reveal what he’s thinking and any needs he might have by signing and his facial expressions. Apparently these are some of the clearest and most expressive his teacher has seen, and have served him well so far. In fact, his little personality is incredibly endearing and he’s quickly won the admiration of staff and his peers.

At the moment, I’m not overly concerned about his speech. Yes, we’re desperate to have a two-way conversation with him and find out even more about him, but we’ve waited this long so what’s a few more months? Intellectually and academically he’s proving to be on point, even if it’s harder to gauge.

Shock #3 - He only interacts with one member of staff

I’ve read about this before. It’s a form of separation anxiety where he’s found a substitute for me in a nursery leader. He’ll rush straight to her when he enters nursery and hug her leg when he’s feeling anxious or needs some assistance. I found myself apologising for this as I can imagine it being irritating when she is trying to teach 15 other children, but she quickly informed me this was common and actually flattering.

He’s actually picked the best person to latch onto. Mrs B is actually the head of his unit and hugely experienced. Him spending so much time with her means she’s had the perfect opportunity to observe him, and has probably led to her being so quick to alert the SENCO. She’s definitely very knowledgeable about our little guy and we can only attribute this to the obvious interest they’ve taken in one another. The first thing she said when we sat down at the rickety table in the school hall was “he’s a real delight” which instantly allayed any nerves.

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So a few shocks and some really detailed feedback about our little guy. If I wasn’t 100% confident in his nursery before, I am now.

I’m not disappointed with Dexter at all. I’m not overly concerned about any of the above either. In fact, I’m seriously proud of him. He has revealed himself to be a sweet, kind and polite little boy who is happy to share toys, sit quietly and respect the rules of the school. He’s wormed his way into the affections of the staff despite showing a clear preference for one teacher and refusing to talk. Craig and I (and his teachers) are all really excited to see where he goes from here.

Sep 20 2015

My greatest schoolgirl errors

Posted on September 20, 2015 by admin

I was actually a bright pupil - voted “most likely to succeed” and achieved pretty much straight As throughout secondary school (I know right… what happened?). For 4 years I also dated the most popular guy in school and was *probably* the envy of most of my classmates. Yet as cool as I thought I was, looking back I made some monumental schoolgirl errors - all whilst sporting a skirt that barely covered my bum, lips coated in Rimmel’s Heather Shimmer and dangerously overplucked eyebrows.

With Dex now one step closer to entering the acne-ridden world of school himself, I’ve been reliving some of my most mortifying school memories. Sit back and get ready to cringe…

The remote control incident

Nothing made you happier as 90s schoolkid than walking into a classroom and seeing that one of these monstrosities had been wheeled in:

classtv

Yep, the TV and VCR combo meant an easy lesson and a distracted teacher for at least an hour. It didn’t matter if we were being played a BBC production of Romeo & Juliet or a documentary on China’s one-child policy - TV lessons were just about the coolest things to happen to you at school.

Being the rebel I was, upon discovering the school had the same model VCR as we did at home, I pinched my parent’s remote control in what was to be perhaps the most long-awaited prank in school history. I was to wait until the next time our teacher was sporting a hangover and needed a darkened classroom full of silent children and technology to do her job for her.

After months of waiting, finally my moment came and Miss Mercer informed us we’d be watching a documentary on where babies come from. Before pressing play she went to great lengths to tell us that she wouldn’t tolerate any giggling and we were to wait until the end to ask questions. Perfect time to whip out the remote!

The video was full of the usual drivel adults feed you about sex - “When a man and woman love each other very much” etc - but there was a cartoon of a couple copulating under the bedsheets that was probably the most risque thing we’d been exposed to at aged 11. As this bit inevitably got the most giggles, it was this bit I rewound and replayed… over and over again.

Every time, Miss Mercer would get up, eject the cassette and give it a shake before putting it back on again. The video would resume playing and I’d rewind right on back to the sexy bit. The same dance went on for some 10 glorious minutes and I gained some serious admiration from my mates. I’d have totally got away with it too, had it not been for one child who proceeded to grass me up after an argument over boyfriends one lunch-time.

A letter home and 2 weeks of detentions for that little stunt.

Lost in translation

I clench a little every time I think of this.

At school, you understand, your vocabulary swells and inflates quickly. You end up using these words either eloquently or apathetically for the rest of your life - let’s face it many of us have winced over a colleague’s improper use of their, they’re or there. Yet fortunately for me, English was one of my stronger subjects, and good grades came easily enough. Essays on Return of the Native or King Lear were laden with commentary on catharsis, pathetic-fallacy and nods to the socio-economic context in which they were written. In short, I knew my stuff.

Yet for all the grandiose words Mrs Archer taught us, I was also learning new words from my classmates - the sort you’re more likely to hear from me today (and the sort I seriously hope my own kids use a little less publicly).

So one day, when outrageously flirting with my maths teacher (despite his New Balance trainers, he rode a motorbike which elevated him to James Dean-like status) in front of the entire class I playfully hit him with the C Bomb. I remember clearly his eyebrows narrowed and his whole demeanor changed.

In fairness, I hadn’t actually meant to disgrace myself or insult him. In my mind, cu$t was playful, inoffensive and U-rated, like prat. When it was obvious to him that the severity of what I had said was lost on me, he asked me to both repeat it and tell the class what it meant. After stumbling my way through a pretty ineffectual explanation, he proceeded to tell me its more anatomical meaning. It seemed I’d effectively called the sexiest teacher in school a walking vagina.

I might have hoped that his anger would dilute down to bemusement, but it didn’t. I got a week’s worth of detentions for that one.

A first kiss made public

Despite being pretty popular, my first proper kiss came later for me than it did for most of mates. Not that they knew this of course. If you had asked them back then, they’d have told you I’d been snogging my hot slightly older neighbour for years. In fact, I was so into this make-believe boyfriend, it gave me the perfect excuse to avoid Spin the Bottle with my classmates.

By aged 12 though, after having a few sips of some lager a group of us had stolen from our dads, curiosity got the better of me. Early evening we crawled under my garden fence and onto our school field. There were real advantages to living so close to school as football pitches were marked out all year round and the teachers generally overlooked us using it if we didn’t leave litter.

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And so, sitting in the middle of a tennis pitch of Little Heath Secondary School, an empty bottle of Budweiser decided who I was share my first French kiss with. Wonderfully, it was to be Aaron, a shy but beautiful-looking boy that I’d written the odd poem about in my diary that summer- despite my nerves I leaned in and let him take the lead. What followed was your typical sloppy, mechanical and somewhat frightening first kiss we all end up having at some point in our teens - but to me it was perfect.

So perfect in fact, you might have thought I’d been delighted to discover it had actually been captured, for prosperity’s sake, by the school’s new CCTV system. It seemed our school might have turned a blind eye to children playing the odd game of 5-a-side on school property after the bell had gone, but they weren’t so amenable to drinking on school premises and lewd behaviour.

Some 7 of us were then invited into our Head of Year’s office and had the embarrassing job of assuring her we were only kissing and weren’t regularly exploring each others bodies behind the bike sheds. We might have managed to convince her that she was not going to have to deal with any teen pregnancies that summer, but she wasn’t willing to let us get away with the fact our choice of refreshment that evening had come in 440ml cans. Letters duly went home to our parents and most of us got grounded for a good few weeks.

So there it is - my three most abiding school memories. Technology, bad language and sex - all re-imagined for an adult audience. Come on then, dare you to tell me yours…

This is my entry into the #LVSchoolboyErrors comp via LV=

Aug 12 2015

How teaching your child can strengthen your bond

Posted on August 12, 2015 by admin

Parents choose to homeschool their children for a whole range of reasons. For example, teaching outside traditional classroom environments can help kids who are bored or frustrated at school, or who are being bullied by their peers.

Also, it’s now easier than ever for parents to access the resources they need to home educate their youngsters. Education specialists like www.oxfordhomeschooling.co.uk offer learning materials for a range of courses, including Key Stage 3 and GCSE. Being able to tap into resources like these makes homeschooling much easier. Another reason to consider educating your kids yourself is the fact that it can help to strengthen your bond, and here’s how:

Spending time together

Time is a precious commodity for many modern families. With parents under pressure at work and kids spending their days in school, the little ‘family time’ that people do get tends to consist of mums, dads and children staring at the TV in the evenings or sitting in the same rooms as one another while busily tapping away on their own smartphones and tablets.

In contrast, if you homeschool your youngsters, you’ll get to spend the best parts of each day in their company, engaging with them in a meaningful way. This can play a major role in helping to strengthen the connection between you and your kids.

Having the freedom to try a range of activities

Another bonus associated with homeschooling concerns that fact that you’ll get to try out a whole range of interesting activities with your kids that you might otherwise miss out on. From taking educational day trips to places like museums, aquariums and castles to getting stuck into arts and crafts in the comfort of your home, there’s no shortage of things to keep you and your kids occupied and to enhance your youngsters’ education. As well as being fun, these shared learning experiences can bring you and your kids closer. Every day, you’ll have the chance to create new memories that you can cherish for years to come.

Nurturing your child’s talents

You’ll also have the time and focus you need to nurture your children’s talents. By watching them as they learn, you’ll get to see exactly where their strengths and passions lie and you can do your bit to encourage them to apply themselves to the relevant subjects or hobbies. By being there for your youngsters and helping them to fulfil their potential in this way, you can further cement your bond.

Given the positive impact that homeschooling can have on the relationships between parents and kids, it’s little wonder that a rising number of mums and dads are investigating this alternative to mainstream education.