I read a great post over on Mummy Vs Daddy this morning that really made me think. As far as I’m concerned Sarah (aka Mummy) is spot on with her write-up and decision not to get her two daughter’s (aged 4 & 5 years old) ears pierced. She cites the fact that their bodies are their own and she doesn’t feel comfortable making such a decision on their behalf - for me, the problem actually goes further than this.

I realise this might be viewed as controversial but it’s not stopped me before, and won’t stop me now. I’m all for an age limit on piercing of any kind, with no parental consent clause.

Why? I see piercing young children as cruel and unnecessary. Why put your child through something that will hurt them in order to make them ‘look pretty’, or worse still, for the sake of announcing to the world that your baby is a girl? When I see babies with earrings it honestly makes me want to cry - when Dexter is immunised his little screams break my heart. Why would you put them through a similar pain when it’s wholly unnecessary?

DEBUNKING THE EXCUSES

“It’s a girl!”

When Dexter was tiny, occassionally a passerby would comment on “how pretty she was”. Did it bother me? Not really. It’s an easy mistake to make. I didn’t dress Dexter permanently in blue from that point on to avoid future confusion, nor would I feel the need to swamp my baby girl in pink. When it comes down to it, why does it matter that someone might mistake your baby for the opposite sex? The baby certainly won’t care, so why should mum or dad? What’s wrong with hairbands and tutus anyway!?

Further to this point - ear piercing is also such an outmoded form of stereotyping. Women no longer subscribe to same inflexible definition of ‘pretty’ anymore. There is also beauty in athleticism, intelligence and creativity - let your little girl work out how they want to project their own feminity, in their own time. They might end up being pretty hacked off that you’ve mutilated their body and not given them the choice.

“It’s inherent within my culture / religion”

It’s true, ear piercing is a deep-rooted tradition in Spain and Latin America. Often, new mums will be presented with gold ear studs for her newborn, and the baby will leave the hospital wearing them. Similarly, in Hinduism the ear-piercing ceremony (Karnavedha) is performed on both sexes and has deep mystical and symbolic significance. It’s believed that it cleanses sin and nurtures the spirit and in some places, it’s considered a sin not to have your lobes pierced. It could therefore be argued that raising the age of consent would violate their religious and cultural rights.

Now, I’m all for cultural tolerance but not when it upsurps the physical well-being of a innocent child. Violence and inflicting pain on others (in whatever form) is simply not tolerated in this society. We’ve stuck by our guns when many cultural practices have been banned in this county - and this should be no exception. By all means - practice your religions, and continue to embrace your heritage here in Britain - but our laws are our laws.

“It’ll spare her the pain of getting pierced later in life”

This excuse stems from the belief that if parents get their children’s ears pierced as babies, they can control the cleaning and sterilsation of the wound so it won’t become infected. In the same breath, these parents will state “she won’t remember the pain / It’s kinder to do it when shes tiny”- there’s so much wrong with this argument I don’t know where to begin.

At 30 years of age, I don’t have my ears pierced and have no intention of doing so. I won’t stop my daughter from doing it when she reaches a sensible age, but there’s absolutely no certainty that she’ll want to. Ear piercing is a matter of personal choice, not a given. Surely this argument also lends itself to the fact that there should be a age limit to having piercing in the first place! If piercings are illegal for under 16′s - they would surely be aware of the implications of not looking after the wound themselves and the pain associated with it when they opt in to the procedure!

In conclusion

I’m well aware that this debate has existed for some time and is unlikely to be resolved anytime soon. As Britain is a multicultural society, our government often turn a blind eye to such practices for fear of upsetting some sub-cultures. Opinion polls seem largely to support my view though - with some people going so far as to dub the practice as a form of child abuse.

Whilst I wouldn’t go so far as to casually fling the word abuse into the debate, I do see it as cruel, unnecessary and ugly. It’s not for me to tell anyone how to parent but don’t expect me not to tear up when I see a baby sporting a stud. Babies are so precious - please think carefully before subjecting them to the pain.